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    Wednesday, May 01, 2024

    Please pass the Oreos

    Among the many ... strong ... reactions to Nabisco's support-via-Oreo of Gay Pride Month, one of my favorites was one by David Hinckley of the New York Daily News.

    Hinckley bemoaned the now-infamous Facebook posting of a rainbow-color-filled Oreo because they don't actually exist and therefore the sweet-teethed among us can't enjoy a few (dozen). Six layers of Oreo cream artfully stacked between those fabulous chocolate-y cookies?! Sign us up!

    Hinckley writes, "I'm not sure the colors of all this filling are found in nature. I'm quite sure I don't care. What's a little food dye when you've got all that tasty sweet stuff? ... I saw this picture and after a brief moment to appreciate its aesthetics and message, every other thought in my head was immediately overpowered by this one: 'Where can I get me a package of these?'

    "It was only then that I read the fine print, which says this isn't a real cookie. You can't buy it. You can't eat it. It's a statement. And that's okay."

    And yes, is it most certainly OK, particularly when you read the intro to the Facebook post which reads simply: "Proudly support love."

    I was relieved to find Hinckley's post and others like it, because after reading the mountain of venomous, hate-filled comments to the post, I was more than a little scared.

    Among the (printable) criticisms of Oreo's post were statements like this (spelling, etc. in context):

    "This is gross, I will make sure to never eat oreos again."

    And: "I am sad I will never buy your cookies it's about time we christian stand up for what the Bible calls this SIN."

    And finally: "Being gay is totally wrong And should be a crime"

    I have a few other ideas of things that should be considered a crime, but I don't know how we'll ever get laws against stupidity/bad grammar/convenient Bible-thumping passed, so I'll move on.

    Among the many, many fabulous retorts to the the Anti-Oreo Party were these:

    "Saying that homosexuality, which occurs throughout nature, isn't natural AND declaring their love for Oreos, which are completely un-natural is rather amusing, y'all."

    And: "Good for you Nabisco! Equality tastes even better than Oreos!"

    And, my personal favorite: "Enjoy your Hydrox, haters!"

    I'll make an incredibly naive statement: I really didn't think people actually hated the LGBT with such ferocity.

    I know, I know, but I'm from a Blue State and was raised by hippies in New Britain—not a lot of room for discrimination there. The types of people I tend to hang with remain amazed that many other people care about who marries whom—when, indeed, many of those people are fricking insane and/or the marriages they sanction aren't always cultural benchmarks for society.

    One of my favorite signs from the pro-gay-marriage rallies puts it a little better: "We want to be miserable, too."

    Listen, my hippie* circle knows there are plenty of haters in the world, some more despicable than others, but getting cheesed off at a cookie is a little much—that's some hair-trigger hate right there.

    And really, again, I have to ask: WHY DO THEY CARE? Why the obsession? Who spends that much time thinking about what goes on in other people's bedrooms? It's a little creepy, actually, and kinda rude, right?

    But hey, they have a right to their opinions (and their miserable marriages). Shouldn't we all? Including Oreo? Let's remember what Oreo's post said: "Proudly support love." Say it with me people: Love. (Or just watch this. Those hippies were on to something, ay?)

    Maybe we should end this hot-topic blog with some levity. Stephen Colbert puts things so much better than I ever could, anyway.

    This is the opinion of Marisa Nadolny and MN only. Duh. She's on Twitter too: @TheMDesk.

    *Apparently, anyone who isn't in the Tea Party.

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